Christmas Shopping at the Yog-Sothoth Parfumerie
Alert and generous blog reader Perclexed has threatened kindly offered to send me some Yog-Sothoth perfume, purchased originally from the Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab. Just a sample, so I can sniff it. What an offer! Here's the original description, as provided by Perclexed:
It was an All-in-One and One-in-All of limitless being and self -- not merely a thing of one Space-Time continuum, but allied to the ultimate animating essence of existence's whole unbounded sweep -- the last, utter sweep which has no confines and which outreaches fancy and mathematics alike. It was perhaps that which certain secret cults of earth have whispered of as YOG-SOTHOTH, and which has been a deity under other names; that which the crustaceans of Yuggoth worship as the Beyond-One, and which the vaporous brains of the spiral nebulae know by an untranslatable Sign...
The perfume of eternity in vast, unknowable space. A glittering oil, ephemeral, iridescent, and horrifying in its immeasurable emptiness. This is the scent of air and darkness.
I bet that smells GREAT! Yeah! Wish Perclexed had some of the Cthulhu.
Also, Perclexed has some Azathoth perfume:
The Daemon Sultan, Seething Nuclear Chaos...that last amorphous blight of nethermost confusion which blasphemes and bubbles at the centre of all infinity -- the boundless daemon-sultan Azathoth, whose name no lips dare speak aloud, and who gnaws hungrily in inconceivable, unlighted chambers beyond time amidst the muffled, maddening beating of vile drums and the thin, monotonous whine of accursed flutes; to which detestable pounding and piping dance slowly, awkwardly, and absurdly the gigantic ultimate gods, the blind, voiceless, tenebrous, mindless Other Gods whose soul and messenger is the crawling chaos Nyarlathotep.Azathoth is the blind, idiot god who sits on a black throne at the center of Chaos. His scent is high-pitched and screeching, both impenetrably dark and searingly bright with the clarity of madness: tangerine, saffron, vetiver, black amber and cedarwood.
Perclexed says it gives you a headache.
I'll bet.
Well, I'm sorry I missed out on the Lovecraft perfumes, but I'm EXTREMELY glad to have been pointed to the Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab, because, though they have no more Lovecraft perfumes for sale, they have LOTS of other stuff and they apparently continue to invent more. And then they write about it, which is worth whatever they're charging. But how to decide where to spend the money first?
There's the Shakespearean scents; that'd be nice. I'd like to smell like Goneril.
Or the various Sinful scents, which include not only all the Seven Deadlies, but also things like "Vice" in general, if you don't want to get specific. Vice sounds nice, actually; it's "Voluptuous and indulgent! A deep chocolate scent, with black cherry and orange blossom." Right. Vice.
Or there are the various Death scents, including "Embalming Fluid," which sounds better than you'd think, since it's a " light, pure scent: white musk, green tea, aloe and lemon." Hell, I'll take up the trade myself.
The site goes on and on and on and on...I can see that I'm going to have to be careful here. Cause I NEED a lot of this stuff. I NEED it.
Oh! Look! They've got Alice in Wonderland scents! I want. The Jabberwocky.
(I'm reminded, here, of the time Lush discontinued its excellent "Icon" line. The Icon perfume smelled like patchouli, with some other stuff added that made it stronger. When they discontinued it, I bought a LOT; there'll be some left when I die. It should go in the coffin with me; I'm taking it. I love this stuff, though I have to be careful. Once I nearly killed some of my students cause I'd put a bit too much on (which is easy), and then blithely gone off to teach Irish Literature in a Very Small Room. So we couldn't breathe, as the "Icon" was taking up all the air space. But I've also used it to good effect, over at the Cambridgshire Record Office, which is also very small, and if you're reading Elizabethan court rolls, you need a lot of space, which, if you're wearing "Icon," is not hard to come by. )
Now then, for those of you who made it this far and are still starved for pictures of kittens and ancient (for America) houses, Sam is happy to oblige; now that we've got pictures back on the blog, it's all digital camera, all the time, around here.
Here, we see a typical interaction between Lila and the kittens. Lila, who is 15 years old and now cat boss of the house, is eating her special Fancy Feast. The kittens, who adore both Lila and her Fancy Feast, are waiting to see if some is left. If they get any closer, which they will, Lila will take a swipe at them.
Here they are, just sitting together. They do have independent lives now, but they are still each other's favorite being, so they spend LOTS of time together, playing, sleeping, hanging out:
And last, Bear's Retreat, in the snow:
It was an All-in-One and One-in-All of limitless being and self -- not merely a thing of one Space-Time continuum, but allied to the ultimate animating essence of existence's whole unbounded sweep -- the last, utter sweep which has no confines and which outreaches fancy and mathematics alike. It was perhaps that which certain secret cults of earth have whispered of as YOG-SOTHOTH, and which has been a deity under other names; that which the crustaceans of Yuggoth worship as the Beyond-One, and which the vaporous brains of the spiral nebulae know by an untranslatable Sign...
The perfume of eternity in vast, unknowable space. A glittering oil, ephemeral, iridescent, and horrifying in its immeasurable emptiness. This is the scent of air and darkness.
I bet that smells GREAT! Yeah! Wish Perclexed had some of the Cthulhu.
Also, Perclexed has some Azathoth perfume:
The Daemon Sultan, Seething Nuclear Chaos...that last amorphous blight of nethermost confusion which blasphemes and bubbles at the centre of all infinity -- the boundless daemon-sultan Azathoth, whose name no lips dare speak aloud, and who gnaws hungrily in inconceivable, unlighted chambers beyond time amidst the muffled, maddening beating of vile drums and the thin, monotonous whine of accursed flutes; to which detestable pounding and piping dance slowly, awkwardly, and absurdly the gigantic ultimate gods, the blind, voiceless, tenebrous, mindless Other Gods whose soul and messenger is the crawling chaos Nyarlathotep.Azathoth is the blind, idiot god who sits on a black throne at the center of Chaos. His scent is high-pitched and screeching, both impenetrably dark and searingly bright with the clarity of madness: tangerine, saffron, vetiver, black amber and cedarwood.
Perclexed says it gives you a headache.
I'll bet.
Well, I'm sorry I missed out on the Lovecraft perfumes, but I'm EXTREMELY glad to have been pointed to the Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab, because, though they have no more Lovecraft perfumes for sale, they have LOTS of other stuff and they apparently continue to invent more. And then they write about it, which is worth whatever they're charging. But how to decide where to spend the money first?
There's the Shakespearean scents; that'd be nice. I'd like to smell like Goneril.
Or the various Sinful scents, which include not only all the Seven Deadlies, but also things like "Vice" in general, if you don't want to get specific. Vice sounds nice, actually; it's "Voluptuous and indulgent! A deep chocolate scent, with black cherry and orange blossom." Right. Vice.
Or there are the various Death scents, including "Embalming Fluid," which sounds better than you'd think, since it's a " light, pure scent: white musk, green tea, aloe and lemon." Hell, I'll take up the trade myself.
The site goes on and on and on and on...I can see that I'm going to have to be careful here. Cause I NEED a lot of this stuff. I NEED it.
Oh! Look! They've got Alice in Wonderland scents! I want. The Jabberwocky.
(I'm reminded, here, of the time Lush discontinued its excellent "Icon" line. The Icon perfume smelled like patchouli, with some other stuff added that made it stronger. When they discontinued it, I bought a LOT; there'll be some left when I die. It should go in the coffin with me; I'm taking it. I love this stuff, though I have to be careful. Once I nearly killed some of my students cause I'd put a bit too much on (which is easy), and then blithely gone off to teach Irish Literature in a Very Small Room. So we couldn't breathe, as the "Icon" was taking up all the air space. But I've also used it to good effect, over at the Cambridgshire Record Office, which is also very small, and if you're reading Elizabethan court rolls, you need a lot of space, which, if you're wearing "Icon," is not hard to come by. )
Now then, for those of you who made it this far and are still starved for pictures of kittens and ancient (for America) houses, Sam is happy to oblige; now that we've got pictures back on the blog, it's all digital camera, all the time, around here.
Here, we see a typical interaction between Lila and the kittens. Lila, who is 15 years old and now cat boss of the house, is eating her special Fancy Feast. The kittens, who adore both Lila and her Fancy Feast, are waiting to see if some is left. If they get any closer, which they will, Lila will take a swipe at them.
Here they are, just sitting together. They do have independent lives now, but they are still each other's favorite being, so they spend LOTS of time together, playing, sleeping, hanging out:
And last, Bear's Retreat, in the snow:
<< Home