Do Not Fear! I Come in Peace!
I had one of those anthropological experiences last night -- the kind where you go amongst people of a culture different from your own and try to behave yourself politely. I didn't go to basketball games in junior high (or any other kind of game either, really). I didn't go in high school. I didn't go in college. I didn't go in graduate school. I don't go, now that I'm a professor. I don't oppose these things, you understand. I'm just not there.
But now the child seems to have gotten involved in organized sports -- there was that soccer business going on earlier, for instance. I liked the child soccer. It was amusing. Also, I could knit. Recently, his dad signed him up for some basketball clinic, so he can practice dribbling, and to my grief, this involved NOT just going to the basketball clinic -- which Sam covers, but also "performing" as one of the 160 basketball clinic children at half-time last night at the Baldwin-Plum game. They had to pick up uniforms beforehand; the clinic is being run by Baldwin, and since that team is the Fighting Highlanders, the 160 basketball clinic children were therefore the "Little Highlanders."
So I had to go. I figured that probably it was only right that I be involved in watching the child dribble a basketball at halftime. Also, I thought I'd learn some thing.
Well, I have, the main thing being that the next time this event is scheduled I'm afraid I have a headache. Also fainting spells. Hell, consumption -- let's go all out.
Here are other things I learned, whilst being an alien among the People of my Community:
1) It is important that nobody be able to hear the announcer, who is working with a sound system much like the one used by British Railway. This is so that only the people who already know what's being said know what's going on. It's important to be able to distinguish the visitors.
2) Who are already sitting in a "Visitors" section, so you'd think that #1 wouldn't be necessary, but there you are.
3) Knitting is impossible. Though I guess it would have made more room in the bleachers, now that I think of it. And maybe I could have gotten that guy off my coat.
4) As part of the entertainment, humongous young men take the ball away from shorter, quicker, young men, and throw it through the hoop down at the other end.
5) Lots.
6) As another piece of the entertainment, young women in VERY short skirts throw each other in the air and catch each other, only just barely. There is also some synchronized waving about of glittery pom-poms, which is quite fetching.
7) 160 little children do not dribble basketballs in synchronized fashion.
8) Or, indeed, any order at all.
9) But this doesn't matter, as everybody is off buying pizza, other than the parents of the 160 children.
So, that was interesting.
We left after half-time, as did all the other parents of the "Little Highlanders," as it was past their bedtime. I asked the child if he was planning to get involved in this sort of thing when he got to high school. He grinned and said, "I might. Are you going to knit?"
Well, I might, if I can wrestle my needles out from under the bleacher.
But hey! It's the Christmas season!
I have some links to Highly Superior Christmas Decorations:
Several people have blogged the Crochet Model of Chaos Theory. I admire this thing greatly. Sorry, Carl Andy, you're not getting this for Christmas. Just no time, alas.
Nor am I making the Gingerbread Motherboard, though I want to, you bet.
Next! Somebody invent a working model!
But now the child seems to have gotten involved in organized sports -- there was that soccer business going on earlier, for instance. I liked the child soccer. It was amusing. Also, I could knit. Recently, his dad signed him up for some basketball clinic, so he can practice dribbling, and to my grief, this involved NOT just going to the basketball clinic -- which Sam covers, but also "performing" as one of the 160 basketball clinic children at half-time last night at the Baldwin-Plum game. They had to pick up uniforms beforehand; the clinic is being run by Baldwin, and since that team is the Fighting Highlanders, the 160 basketball clinic children were therefore the "Little Highlanders."
So I had to go. I figured that probably it was only right that I be involved in watching the child dribble a basketball at halftime. Also, I thought I'd learn some thing.
Well, I have, the main thing being that the next time this event is scheduled I'm afraid I have a headache. Also fainting spells. Hell, consumption -- let's go all out.
Here are other things I learned, whilst being an alien among the People of my Community:
1) It is important that nobody be able to hear the announcer, who is working with a sound system much like the one used by British Railway. This is so that only the people who already know what's being said know what's going on. It's important to be able to distinguish the visitors.
2) Who are already sitting in a "Visitors" section, so you'd think that #1 wouldn't be necessary, but there you are.
3) Knitting is impossible. Though I guess it would have made more room in the bleachers, now that I think of it. And maybe I could have gotten that guy off my coat.
4) As part of the entertainment, humongous young men take the ball away from shorter, quicker, young men, and throw it through the hoop down at the other end.
5) Lots.
6) As another piece of the entertainment, young women in VERY short skirts throw each other in the air and catch each other, only just barely. There is also some synchronized waving about of glittery pom-poms, which is quite fetching.
7) 160 little children do not dribble basketballs in synchronized fashion.
8) Or, indeed, any order at all.
9) But this doesn't matter, as everybody is off buying pizza, other than the parents of the 160 children.
So, that was interesting.
We left after half-time, as did all the other parents of the "Little Highlanders," as it was past their bedtime. I asked the child if he was planning to get involved in this sort of thing when he got to high school. He grinned and said, "I might. Are you going to knit?"
Well, I might, if I can wrestle my needles out from under the bleacher.
But hey! It's the Christmas season!
I have some links to Highly Superior Christmas Decorations:
Several people have blogged the Crochet Model of Chaos Theory. I admire this thing greatly. Sorry, Carl Andy, you're not getting this for Christmas. Just no time, alas.
Nor am I making the Gingerbread Motherboard, though I want to, you bet.
Next! Somebody invent a working model!


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